Children are a Poor Man’s Riches

The router is up and running since last night and this means, I’m back. Anyway, I suppose it is still not too late to be wishing all mums around the world “Happy Belated Mother’s Day”. Luckily it was on a Sunday. So, everyone was at home. Guess what I did the whole Sunday…. house cleaning, rearranging the furniture and laundry management. Free and fun way to sweat…. ;)

My brother took the trouble to fly up from Johor Bahru to Penang to celebrate Mother’s Day with my Mum. She was very happy indeed. They spent the day shopping.

Talking of mothers, I am reminded to last week’s encounter. My son’s school bus’ driver, a single mum, approached me to start teaching her daughter English Language. (I used to be a part time teacher for Accounting & English Language to the Forms 4 & 5 at a tuition centre in the neighbourhood last year and decided to stop doing so since I had to follow my hubby abroad.) I declined politely as I may be going off to another country in the near future. I suggested that she signs up with one of the tuition centres.

For the sake of her child, she pleaded to me and I could not refuse once I noticed that she was in tears. I guess every mum would do anything in her child’s best interest, even if it needs her to put aside her pride. Eventually, I agreed to have her kid at my house for two hours every Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, for free. I had never done it for the money anyway. Just for the love of sharing.

Know what I call that thing which the single mum has? I label it the Power of Motherhood. Naturally, motherhood grants a woman, no matter how young and naïve she may be, the unimaginable power and strength to ensure that her children are loved, happy, healthy, safe and successful. That’s why, since the beginning of time, as early as the first month of pregnancy, mothers would go through the unthinkable for their children. I did that once. I had to forgo my college degree to give way to the pregnancy of my first child. Ten years later, I found myself to be one of the oldest in the class full of youngsters when I resumed my quest for a college degree. Ha..ha..

I was just wondering, with the current lifestyle and only God knows what’s coming in the future, can a child do the same for a mother? I suppose, that’s one of the reason why I started this blog ~ to remind my children and other youngsters about the values and attributes one should adopt in order to live a civilised and decent life. Even if they had the best accomplishments in life, it still means nothing without any values and good attributes.

It’s actually the karma of life. What goes round comes around. I remember a Malay saying that states “A mother can care for ten children, but a child may not be able to care for a mother.” It gives me the chills to even imagine if one day my children decide to keep me away at an old folks home. (They’d better not…or they’d be scraped off from the will!!!)

All in all, maternal instinct is natural in any woman. Even those who are unfortunate enough to conceive one, there are so many ways to be a mother. Bottom line, never give up. On a negative note, I am still annoyed with reports about mothers ‘throwing away’ their newborn babies in the dustbins, by the roadsides, in the toilets et cetera. Please…. If those babies aren’t welcomed, just give away properly. There are still people who would love to raise them as their own.

As for me, I’m blessed with two children, and it looks like that’s it. Since being diagnosed with PCOS last year, I have put a stop to dreaming and hoping for another child, a girl maybe. For now, I’ll just look forward and settle for a daughter-in-law! Overall, I am a happy woman and I am grateful for that.

Courtesy is Free

It was a beautiful Wednesday morning as always yesterday, until I checked my inbox to read e-mails from friends, near and far. Among the many mails, there was a mail for a comment sent to this humble blog of mine. How sweet…. Someone had dropped by and left me a note. What a beautiful Wednesday indeed.

Eagerly, I read through the lines and how astonished I was with the tone of it. At the beginning, that was how it was; but later it amused me that I just decided to reject and ignore the comment.

Later in the evening, over a pile of creased clothes, while doing the normal homemaker’s dreaded chore of ironing, I decided to give my two cents. (Don’t know whether it was either the heat and steam from the iron or the adrenaline rush from being challenged by a stranger that had affected this change of decision!) Nevertheless, I was and still am happy to have the following constructive critic for my effort to shift the paradigm of the normal typical Malay SAHM population. You may be asking, "How can this help?", right?.... Well, put it this way…. Blogging may be a new therapy for women to release their stress and let their frustration out. Therefore, there will be a lower percentage of nagging wives and mothers at home! Make any sense?

Anyway, the mail wrote:

abdul has left a new comment on your post "Here We Go!!":

hehe.. wat blog plak ek..jom kita tgk berapa lama bertahan.. saya dulu just 1 month only, pastu malaih dah.. wakakaka

So, Encik Abdul, whoever and wherever you may be, younger or older than me, I must say, “From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”

That’s the least I can do considering that it is just what I was taught to do, back in my school days. My headmistress, Sister Aidan, a well-built and strict Irish nun, had taught me well. So did my Ustaz Ahmad of the Penang State Mosque. And of course, so did my very particular and disciplined parents, grandparents, aunties, uncles and the whole tribesmen!

Then, we were taught to be polite, well mannered, ethical et cetera. The simplest thing as greetings such as “Assalamu’alaikum” or “Good Morning” or “Hello” was essential to portray our traits, personality and teachings. It was also a very important indicator of how refined our family’s principles and background were. We owe it to our forefathers (or even our ancestors!) to uphold what had been taught and brought down the line of the family tree.

Nowadays, I find that most children lack these values. I don’t really know what they are teaching in school these days, but I see very unsatisfactory products out of it. (Speaking from the experience as a mother to two hyperactive boys, trust me, I know what I am talking about!) There are no more ‘Sister Aidans’ or ‘Ustaz Ahmads’ around to assist these kids in schools. Schools are now more exam-oriented. (And it is beginning to sound more like the manufacturing term of “result-oriented” each year!). That’s why more mothers, like me, are staying at home; to make sure that these values be inculcated in our children. (And in case you are wondering…..Nope, my Mum had worked two shifts daily throughout the whole 35 years of her life and now happily enjoying her pension! Thanks to teachers like Sister Aidan and Ustaz Ahmad, she can have it all...)

In short, Encik Abdul, if you may have any difficulty digesting my humble English Language (not that I belittle your ability and skills!; sincerely, I do apologise if you feel offended in any manner), I’ll just translate it in these two Malay sentences that my grandmother used to nag at her grandchildren, “Kalau masuk rumah orang, bagi salam dulu, jangan tau serbu saja! Dah masuk, duduk diam-diam kat depan, jangan meronda satu rumah!”….. Another thing, I extend my sympathy for your failure to continue what you had started that lasted just a month, after being stung by the typical Malay ‘bug’ i.e. laziness.

At least, I am in my second month!… And still going, InsyaAllah….;)

Earth is Dearer than Gold

Tonight is the night where cities around the world will shut off their lights for an hour, starting from 8 pm, to deliver a powerful message about the need for action on global warming. Promoted by the World Wide Fund for Nature Australia (WWF), Earth Hour is the highlight of a major campaign to encourage businesses, communities and individuals to take the simple steps needed to cut their emissions on an ongoing basis. It is about simple changes that will collectively make a difference – from businesses turning off their lights when their offices are empty, to households turning off appliances rather than leaving them on standby.

It will be just a mere hour to be in the dark. It is our choice to make changes. It is not like we are forced to be in the dark without electricity. Trust me, it would be scary.

Back in September 1999, when central Taiwan was hit with a destructive earthquake, we were in Kaoshiung, a city down south of the island. Had rushed to Taipei to get the next flight back to Malaysia but the airport was closed as the electricity was cut off. That night was the longest night of my life! We had to climb 12 storeys of stairs in order to get to our friend's apartment in the dark, with a baby, a toddler and luggages clinging to us. The aftershock tremors felt throughout the night made it impossible to sleep. As they say, the earth was really 'angry'.

Since young, we were taught to do our bit to help Mother Nature. I still remember my Dad used to give his I-don’t-like-that look, each time we absent-mindedly walked out a room without switching off the lights or fans. In school, my teachers would go on and on about recycling, reducing and reusing; which eventually became my favourite hobby. (There was once, I don’t mind looking like an idiot, trying to ‘fish’ an empty can out of the drain in front of my house, back in Malaysia!) At home, my youngest kid gets very annoyed each time he is to wear his elder brother’s hand-me-down clothes. Over here in Indonesia, I tend to be thrifty and save money from buying unnecessary containers when I can just make do with a nicely cut out plastic bottles.

The next generation should be taught to be aware, uphold and practise these values. It is no longer an awareness of any campaign but it is a good value to live life. Not only it will help them to be a better person by being sensitive to the environment, they will also learn to save and get creative.

So, let’s just have an hour of romantic evening under the moonlight and the stars tonight!